>As midnight came nearer, their mom suggested us off to bed. Bentlee immediately asked to sleep in Montana’s room with us but was instantly denied by her sister.
“You’re not even her friend,” she protested wanting support from her mom.
Both her mom and dad shrugged and walked away not wanting to be brought in. Defeated, Bentlee left to her room.
“Don’t worry, she’ll be sound asleep in half an hour and not even remember by morning. I doubt she got much sleep at all last night.”
Going off with Montana to her bedroom, we quickly changed and retreated under her covers with the lights out. I was pretty tired too after a whole day of learning new video games and jumping around a tad.
The two of us talked a little bit in the dark keeping everything as casual as possible. Quickly enough, our words became slurred and long; I fell asleep.
I woke up maybe two hours later to hearing Montana breathing heavily. Before I could catch myself, I accidently spoke.
“What are you doing?”
Instantly, she stopped.
“Nothing.”
“Are you cold?” I stupidly asked.
“No,” she replied with a shake in her voice.
I rolled over closer to her wanting to talk with her more. I wasn’t that tired anymore for some reason. I moved my hand to place it on her belly as a joke; she was lying on her back. My fingers tensed feeling her bare skin and naval.
Slowly, I moved my hand up to touch where I thought the rim of her nightgown must have hiked up too. Montana was silent. Farther and farther my hands moved until the pressed into the bare bottoms of her breasts.
“Where’s your nightgown?” I asked pulling my hands away and kicking myself into a firmer position. I felt something soft catch on my big toe. As I curled up my knee and reached down for it, she answered.
“It’s still on; it just got hiked up to my shoulders.”
“Why?” I asked, “and why were your underwear down by our feet?” I knew the feel of that fabric once it was between my fingers. As evidence, I brought them out of the covers and set them between our faces.
“Um,” she sounded almost as if about to cry, “I, it’s just, it’s so intense to feel naked next to someone else. Cause I’ve never done it before.” Every word she said was struggled out of her. I was just coming to realize what she was actually doing. She was masturbating right next to me while I slept. I didn’t know what to think but I knew I couldn’t let her feel that embarrassed; she was my best and only friend. No matter what she did, I needed her, especially during my pregnancy.
“Like when I was naked in front of Ean the first time,” I said. “It was so incredibly scary but I loved every second of it.”
“I’m so sorry Maeghan. I’m just really weird and messed up. I can understand if you don’t like me anymore.”
“No,” I responded harshly. “I understand.” I wasn’t sure if anything I was saying was getting through to her mind.
“I swear though it’s not because of the kiss. I don’t like you like that. I mean you really are really pretty but, it’s just,”
She kept stumbling over her words. Clearly she was stuck inside a sphere of shame and guilt. The way she so desperately tried explaining herself without giving me a chance to communicate with her, it was almost as if she needed me more than I needed her.
Quickly, for some reason that I’ll never understand, my thumbs pushed into my underwear and kicking my legs, I pulled them from my ankles. Removing them from the covers, I placed them on top of Montana’s.
“I didn’t want the kiss to be like that, I just wanted a peck but you fell on me. That wasn’t your fault though,”
“Montana,” I called.
“I’m so sorry. Please can we just forget this weekend ever happened? You never have to come over again.”
The more anxious she got, the worse I felt. My body began taking over and pulling up my nightgown to my shoulders. For some reason, I felt it necessary to mimic her situation like that would be the only way to fix us. Like to be real best friends, we had to go through the same worst moments together.
Her voice kept stuttering as she ignored me though. I had never seen her like it before. I had never seen Montana so scared, so infantile. I had to outdo her in embarrassment.
And then I did it. The absolute most embarrassing thing my mind could possibly ever think of. Rolling my naked body over, I pulled myself onto hers and pushed my lips to her face. We were two naked girls kissing and it was all my doing. Montana instantly stopped talking. This was one situation where I somehow felt our two different ages played a big role. She was a fifteen year old masturbating in the same bed as her fourteen year old friend. But as her fourteen year old friend, I felt as if I could actually get away with kissing her fifteen year old lips. I was a younger girl after all.
Pulling my mouth back, I couldn’t help but feel everything. How our breasts smashed into each others, the same with our stomachs, and then how amazingly hot it was in the air pocketed between our four legs and thighs.
I looked to her silently.
“It’s just experimenting between friends,” I said softly. “We both like Ean more than anything in the world so we know we’re not lesbians. But we are still kids and kids get curious; so it’s all normal.”
The combined beating of our two hearts into our meeting chests was the most chaotic sensation I had ever felt.
“Really?” she wisped.
“All I know is that as long as I love my brother, nothing else matters. I’m pregnant right now with his baby and he’s changing his entire life to protect me and it. There is nothing we could do that would ever take anything I feel from him away. You’re my best friend and with everything you’ve been through, I want to help you no matter what. Besides, all the stuff you want to do makes me curious about myself too.
“I hate feeling uncomfortable around you. I have enough stuff to constantly worry about. I just want to be able to do anything with you or you with me and it’s all just fun; no more worrying about if it’s right or wrong. We’re best friends and I never plan on that changing no matter what happens.”
I probably surprised myself with what I just said as much as I surprised Montana. I didn’t know why or where it came from but as it just flowed from me, I agreed with it all because it all made sense. I never was good with worrying. I guess that was why I never planned ahead. I always relied on my best ability, making things up on the spur of the moment and it was times like just then that proved me.
“No more right or wrong?” Montana said.
“From now on, if one of us is curious about something we see on TV or read in a book or hear at school, no matter what, we can always come to the other and test it out to see for ourselves. Okay?”
“Okay,” she replied a little unsure before thinking a bit and answering again, “Okay!”
“We’ll make a pact right now then,” I said.
“What kind of pact?”
I pushed my body off of hers and pulled up the covers before standing and walking to turn on the lights. With the room lit up, I turned to Montana sitting up while pulling her nightgown back down over her body.
“We’ll get naked and we have to look at and touch every part of the other person’s body. That way, there’s no secrets. We’ll have seen and touched it all so trying something new later won’t be that big of a deal.”
I didn’t know how I was determining all of this but I was guessing my experience with Ean played a big role. One reason why I felt so comfortable with him was because I knew he had already seen and touched every square inch of my body. He knew my most personal physical details and he still came back for more. As innocent as I was trying to sound though, I could feel how much I was growing up since before Ean came back home.
Seeing how hesitant Montana was and knowing that I really really didn’t want to back down and live with this night in the back of both our minds, I pulled my nightgown up and flung it from my body onto her bed.
And there I was, standing in front of my best friend completely naked. I was a fourteen year old girl as physically mature as a thirteen year old, at least hopefully that, and I was showing it all to my normal fifteen year old friend.
“You have to do it now. Unless you still want to believe in right and wrong between us. If so we can go back to bed and pretend this never happened or stop being friends because you don’t like me anymore.”
Montana immediately sprang up onto her feet. After that though, she hesitantly began pulling up her nightgown. I watched as it reached her belly where I noticed a long wide scar looking directly at me from just within her panty line. It was maybe five inches long and got up to half an inch wide.
With as much strength as I could, I finally broke my eyes from it to find Montana painfully staring at my face. I held my gaze at her neck while she finished removing the fabric from her body. As it fell to the ground, I looked back to her eyes.
“I fell from a tree three years ago. On the way down, a branch tried catching me but didn’t know how. Went all the way to the bone but it did slow me down a lot for the last six foot drop.”
“Ean will love that,” I said consolingly.
“What? Why?”
“He loves anything that makes a person unique. And that’s one booboo you won’t be able to get him to stop kissing.” Montana smiled big.
“Thankfully it’s not too unique though. They said just an inch more to the right and I could have lost my ability to conceive.” I smiled at that and peered down to my belly.
“Well, then we know Ean is going take full advantage of that luck.” Looking back up to Montana’s smiling face, I continued, “Now we explore. Don’t just look and touch what you want to, we have to do it to every single part of each other’s bodies, no matter what.”
Slowly, we both walked to each other.
“Every part?” she asked unsure of herself.
“Bend over,” I said. She obeyed and I reached behind her. Sticking my index finger out, I pushed it between her butt cheeks and ran it down to slide over her tiniest butt hole. I stopped at its feeling and pushed a little before pulling back off. Touching her shoulder and guiding her back up straight, I repeated to her, “Every part. That way there’s no questioning each other because we both did it.”
Realizing what I just did, I squinted and reluctantly accepted what I had to do next. Taking tiny steps, I turned my body around and gently dropped forward splaying my butt into the air before my best friend. I couldn’t look back to her. And sure enough, eventually, Montana’s finger rested at the top of my butt crack and started falling down it to my hole. Just as I did, she stopped there.
“And Ean actually fit that thing of his into this smallest hole?”
“I know, he had his finger in there too before.”
“How did he get it in?”
“You have to really really relax. And kind of do like your pooping.” Subconsciously, my body was acting out what I was saying. My butt hole began relaxing like I learned from Ean just as Montana started pushing a little.
I heard her gasp and immediately felt why. Something, her finger, was entering my butt hole. It pushed in only maybe half an inch, but it pushed in. We were both frozen. Needless to say, my butt was incredibly tense, locking Montana tightly in. Pulling out would take some obvious force that would probably stimulate me in a very weird way.
“What do I do?” she asked scared.
“What do you want to do?” I couldn’t believe I just said that. Never had I popped out so many stupid regrettable sentences to one person as I found myself doing to Montana for some reason.
“Um, I don’t know. It’s really tight on the outside but I think really soft on the inside. It looks like it might hurt if I try pulling on it.” I didn’t know if she realized it but she was applying force.
“I think it would too but I don’t want you to have to push inside me.”
“I don’t mind, I mean, uh,”
“No right or wrong,” I said firmly to her. I actually found myself not caring either way what she did.
“Um, I can try going in since Ean seems to like something in there.” I smiled at her excuse.
“Okay. Keep pushing and I’ll try to relax.”
A few seconds passed before she started pushing again. The pressure it exerted into me felt really weird and kind of nice. I pushed out like I was going to the bathroom and in a sudden smooth motion, her entire finger sunk into me. The feeling was amazingly shocking at how good it was for some reason.
Then I felt a drop roll down my belly. There was only one place it could have come from. Bending over showing my rear to my best friend, I was also displaying my soaking slit.
“It’s so weird in here.”
“Mmmmm,” I squirmed about feeling her finger sizing me up from the inside. Pulling my back up to stand up straight, I released a heavy heavy sigh at the incredible tension I just created. “Try pulling it out.”
Montana looked to me and must have felt that major increase in squeezing power.
“Is that a challenge?”
I just awkwardly smiled to her still feeling the weird intrusion in my rectum.
At that, I could feel her tugging. It became harder and harder. She squatted down to the floor and started using her body weight. It was painful and chilling but the sensation for some reason felt so strangely good.
More and more of her finger broke into my butt cheeks from the dense ring of muscle at the exit. I felt all two and a half inches of her pull with the force of her body weight, out of my body. As her fingertip broke free, I heard her hit the floor with a soft thump. I turned and looked down to her feeling incredibly tingly.
“How did that feel?” she asked truly curious.
“I’ll show you,” I smirked. More than anything after that, more than wanting her to feel what I just felt so we could talk about it and understand it together, I wanted to know what it felt like for her, what it felt like to have my finger inside her.
I can probably honestly say with certainty, that that night ended with our friendship on a whole another level. I felt like I could trust her with anything. I broke past the point of being an equal to her own sister and moved above.
Sunday morning proved that too. It wasn’t Bentlee, Montana, and I for the remainder of the time I spent there, it was just Montana and I. Bentlee was only there tagging along to the two best friends in the world.
Mom picked me up at about four o’clock that day and with Ean, we went out to eat. At home, mom went off to do some work in her room while Ean and I just watched TV together. Even as I climbed into bed with him to fall asleep, I didn’t try anything. I was just content at the moment from such a great weekend with Montana. And the absolute best way to end it had somehow been found out by Ean, and that was why I loved him so much.
Ean didn’t try a thing with me. He saw my smile when I got into the car that day and just knew what to do. Somehow, he knew that even though I wanted him to treat me like an adult and take me into his bed and have his way with me, there were those times that I still wanted to be fourteen and just a happy excited girl with a loving big brother.
I woke up extra late Monday morning all alone. I slept really well that night. I made the greatest friendship possible that weekend, had the bestest big brother in the world, and got to skip a day of school so I could go to the doctor and learn all about the baby that was growing inside of me. I couldn’t possibly get happier.
That all ended pretty quickly when I ran from the bathroom yelling for my mom.
“What is it honey?” she asked so motherly as she pulled me into a hug.
“I’m bleeding. I’m bleeding.” I was almost crying into her chest.
“Calm down sweetie. That’s not uncommon in early pregnancy. We’ll be at the doctor in a few hours and they’ll check you out to make sure everything is perfectly fine.”
“Really?” I asked slightly obstructed with some mucus in my throat.
“I bled for a little bit early on with you inside me. And you turned out better than fine.”
I smiled as I rubbed a tear from the top of my cheek onto my mom’s shirt. With a bit more confidence, I walked back to the bathroom to take my shower.
The waiting room of the hospital was pure nerve wracking. Ean didn’t come with us as to not increase my chances of slipping up and referring to him, my brother, as the father of the baby in me. Finally the doctor called us in. It felt really embarrassing walking down the halls to his office. I was fourteen and he was checking up on my pregnancy. I felt as if all the nurses were staring down at me knowing what was inside my belly and judging me for it like I got knocked up by some drunken sixteen year old boy about to flunk out of school. Ean couldn’t be any more opposite.
As we got situated in the room, mom told the doctor about the bleeding. He quickly turned to me and told me eye to eye that it was nothing to start worrying about and he was going to give me an ultrasound that day so I could see my baby. That got me really excited. Mom didn’t look all that enthusiastic though.
The doctor then proceeded in checking various things all over my body, asking me a whole lot of questions, and then giving me a bunch of information before he left. We waited around for another hour alone before he came back and took us to another room.
As I kept firm on the exact date that I knew I got pregnant, the doctor said that there probably wouldn’t be much to look at yet as I was only a little more than three weeks in. But he said on the off chance that I was wrong and it happened earlier, I might get more of a show.
Coating my tummy in a bunch of jelly, he pressed the weird ball-like thing to me and began moving it around.
“Well, it appears you may know your body pretty well after all. It doesn’t seem to be too far into, well, wait…”
~
I detonated through the front door to our house and flew straight to my room. I barely caught Ean bouncing off the couch in the living room as I passed. I slammed my door shut and lunged my body into the bed.
Whether it was because all my other senses stopped existing or whatever the fuck, I could hear my mom whispering to my brother just outside my door. I could hear so explosively loud her say that one word to him before he broke my door open to get to me. That one FUCKING word. Miscarriage
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e.l. hanes
hanes_el@yahoo.com for direct contact to me. Thank you.
